Funerals are such pointless affairs. And environmentally costly too — the Chinese kind, at least, where you not only burn incense but also a whole lot of paper objects (with the belief that, for example, burning paper money will give the dead person money to spend Over There).

Whereas the only person actually getting money is the guy running the funeral centre.

I've already told my parents that I'm doing precisely none of this when the time comes.

As for me, I wonder if science would have a use for my body. Or at least someone could make cutlery handles from my bones? Maybe a nice club.